when i was a kid, i usually grew soo excited about christmas that i always ask my parents how many more days do i have to wait for that day. it was fun.
remembering those days, wow, i cant forget my ma being busy in the kitchen cooking dishes, my sister makes he very own fruit salad that i have to sneak just to taste a little into the fridge. my brother, oh he was a staller, he goes out and just be unavailable for any errands so i have to find him and fetch. i miss those days, my pa is outside talking with my uncles and buying some errands for my ma, he complains that we dont need much food in christmas, i was horrified. no he cant do that, christmas for me is like my birthday back then. but still mother knows her way into my pa.. lol.
and now, christmas doesnt need to be grand. my mother on the other country now working, my sister with her and my brother already has his own family. that left me with my father in our house, but he used to go to my ma when im busy at school. this christmas im spending it with my father. and its fun. and i miss him soo much also from being away from him because of school. but it would be more merrier if we are all here, i wouldnt mind pa complaining about the many food we have to prepare, i wouldnt mind my brother leaving the house to avoid any errands, i wouldnt mind my sister lecturing me to behave and try to not eat her salad. just as long as during christmas we are with each other.
having friends and doing things grown ups do is fun.you get to buy and spend night out alot just that sometimes, i wish i could still see christmas as what ive pictured it before. just being with those persons whose been with you the first you celebrated your christmas.

My first 9month long relationship is still kickin'. and its fun! i didnt imagine myself being able to stay that long with someone, im kinda moody and i often say whats on my mind. but being with him, i do learn to brace myself and keep my thoughts and assess before i make a big issue. its good, right?. everything goes well. I even find myself missing him even its only been seconds since he left. We were too comfortable with each other, i even got some of my things on his apartment and he in mine. When he left his tootbrush, he'll use mine, my soap, my shampoo and everything that is "useable", its fine with me;  im also welcome to use his things though.

Too comfortable.
Too constant.
Too dull--
Bored?

Is this just a natural feeling when you've been in a constant cycle of everyday tasks/activities/person?
This feeling could be fleeting; a twist, and whatever this may cause in a ralationship i hope it would not end. there were times when i think about us, getting this long  still standing inspite of some troubles all my thoughts gets well, but when i stop thinking, there it goes again. Should  you hate me for getting bored? dont get me wrong, i do love him and willing to give him my all. Should i ask some space? But i dont believe on people asking "spaces" to their SO. Asking me for space means "get lost" . And i dont wanna do that. He's too special, Coz im in love.

someone once said to me to never allow anybody to talk you out on things. Meaning, its your life;so you decide. its you wholl get bruised, so why ask for somebodys advice. and if so you ask, the bottom line is you still ask yourself. so why ask.

i never really understood what he meant by that until, yes, lately.

That leads me thinking of how people can be sometimes be so annoying on asking other peoples advice but then ending up not listening to any of it. Ive done that, and ive realized that mistake.

And as of 6:39 this evening i will have my first new year resolution for the year 2009. And that Ill only ask advice to someone if and onl if i really NEEDED it. That will not only allow me to trust my points and decisions on things but also realize a mistake when its coming. So i will have to answer to myself and no other else on any matter.

So... how fast can we really realize our mistake? is it after or just as we have done that deed?or are you that person who'll have to need somebody to tell it to them upfront?